Oh… Hi there. We weren’t expecting you today. Um… Cari didn’t tell us anyone would be stopping by. Man…this is kind of awkward. We don’t even have any snacks to offer you…
I’m Cari Doll and this is my sidekick Raggedy Ann. Cari’s mom made me when Cari was thirteen. She looked a lot more like me back then, down to the braces that I’m still wearing eighteen years later. I’m hoping to get them off soon. Cari’s gramma made Raggedy. There’s even an embroidered tattoo over her heart that says “I love Cari.” Raggedy likes to say that I’m the before and she’s the after. She also claims to be the original yarn hair, but only after she’s had a few too many.
We were just hanging out, watching Cari work, when suddenly she threw her red pencil at the wall and ran from the office. She was screaming something about working for a living sucking eggs and needing a patron and where are the Medicis when you need them and some other stuff we couldn’t quite make out because she ran out the front door and down the street.
Don’t worry. She does this from time to time. Chances are tomorrow she’ll be back to normal. Normal for her, anyway. She was barefoot when she left, so she won’t get too far. If you see her going past you, approach with caution. Oatmeal cookies have been known to have a calming effect. If the cookies work, send a few back with her. Dolls like cookies too.
I’ll keep an eye out for Cari this side of the street, and if I see her, I’ll fortify with cookies and coffee. And chocolate.
Posted by: Alison
I too feel like there should be some sort of patronage system in place for those artists who have to work for a living. I hope things work out for you, lady!
And Raggedy Ann might be the original yarn hair (I also had one when I was a kid, and, oddly enough, played a rag doll with yarn hair in a play once), but you wear it so well it doesn’t even matter who did it first.
And if the cookies don’t work, then a few alcholic beverages will do the trick.
Posted by: Jenn
Now this is a key question. Where are the Medicis? They clearly have been remiss in their duties as People Who Give Money to Artists. It’s been ages since they’ve commissioned, well, anything! Perhaps we should all swing by Florence?
Posted by: Cassie
Feel better.
Posted by: Steph
Oh dear. It sounds like she’s having quite a day. I hope she finds some cookies while she’s out there, roaming the streets, looking for Medicis. Tell her brownies work, too!
Posted by: Deb
Dearest Cari: Too bad you don’t like the country (I hear tell you think after a while you can hear the quiet itch or some wickedness like that) because I’m going to get my own cave in the deep woods, warmed by the hot Italian guys Em is sending up. And I’m going to grow my own vegetables, and I’m sorry, there will be bison hunting involved. Um, let’s see, what else? Oh, yes, as I was saying, too bad you don’t like the country, coz it sounds like you need to join me in my little cave venture. Oh, and my cave will be warmed by solar heat (don’t have to worry about that dampness) and it will have not DSL, but wireless broadband. 😀
Posted by: Norma
Cari-Doll, I gotta tell ya, you creep me out just a little. And this from someone who owns some seriously creepy porcelain dolls.
I like your socks, though. They’re quite pretty.
I hope that when you find Cari, she’s feeling less frustrated, but if not, please ask her if she would be interested in a knitting commune. I’m trying desperately to come up with a way to get out of this “working for a living” thing I’ve got going on.
Posted by: Stephanie VW
I’ll keep an eye out for Cari this side of the street, and if I see her, I’ll fortify with cookies and coffee. And chocolate.
Posted by: Alison
I too feel like there should be some sort of patronage system in place for those artists who have to work for a living. I hope things work out for you, lady!
And Raggedy Ann might be the original yarn hair (I also had one when I was a kid, and, oddly enough, played a rag doll with yarn hair in a play once), but you wear it so well it doesn’t even matter who did it first.
And if the cookies don’t work, then a few alcholic beverages will do the trick.
Posted by: Jenn
Now this is a key question. Where are the Medicis? They clearly have been remiss in their duties as People Who Give Money to Artists. It’s been ages since they’ve commissioned, well, anything! Perhaps we should all swing by Florence?
Posted by: Cassie
Feel better.
Posted by: Steph
Oh dear. It sounds like she’s having quite a day. I hope she finds some cookies while she’s out there, roaming the streets, looking for Medicis. Tell her brownies work, too!
Posted by: Deb
Dearest Cari: Too bad you don’t like the country (I hear tell you think after a while you can hear the quiet itch or some wickedness like that) because I’m going to get my own cave in the deep woods, warmed by the hot Italian guys Em is sending up. And I’m going to grow my own vegetables, and I’m sorry, there will be bison hunting involved. Um, let’s see, what else? Oh, yes, as I was saying, too bad you don’t like the country, coz it sounds like you need to join me in my little cave venture. Oh, and my cave will be warmed by solar heat (don’t have to worry about that dampness) and it will have not DSL, but wireless broadband. 😀
Posted by: Norma
Cari-Doll, I gotta tell ya, you creep me out just a little. And this from someone who owns some seriously creepy porcelain dolls.
I like your socks, though. They’re quite pretty.
I hope that when you find Cari, she’s feeling less frustrated, but if not, please ask her if she would be interested in a knitting commune. I’m trying desperately to come up with a way to get out of this “working for a living” thing I’ve got going on.
Posted by: Stephanie VW
Tell Cari I feel her pain. I correct student essays and scientific doctoral theses for money and it’s semester end. It’s a wonder there isn’t a red pencil permanently embedded in my wall. Oatmeal cookies good. Homemade chocolate chip better. Canoli best.
Posted by: Marie
Yeah, working for a living does indeed suck eggs. I only lasted one day.
Posted by: Iris
Hi guys! Now you can raid her stash while she’s gone. Pick something expensive — any of the really colourful sock yarn will do — and hold it hostage until she gives you cookies! Or you could just hide it to make her lose her mind further (while not particularly nice, it is rather amusing to watch).
Posted by: Nadia
Well my little worker bee, the red pencil gig beats working at McDonald’s. I hope it does, anyways.
Posted by: claudia
Jaysus, I hate it when Claudia is right.
I think, in the process of creating a hellish Shakespeare exam for NYC summer school students, I ate my red pencil. So, since I can no longer erase my red marks, this means all of my changes are always right. Right?
A cookie would have gone down a bit better, I think.
Since Cari’s red pencil is embedded in the wall somewhere, she’s no longer armed, so I think I’ll give her a hug in addition to those cookies….
Posted by: Lee Ann
Bawahahahahaahahahaha
Try using blue ink next time. It’s less offensive and will remind you less of getting bad marks in school.
At least if you have to run screaming from the room, since the blue ink will have calmed you more, you would have a chance to put some shoes on first.
Posted by: Jon
Now I can’t stop thinking about what would be the singular of Medici. Medico?
Posted by: mindy
Tell Cari I feel her pain. I correct student essays and scientific doctoral theses for money and it’s semester end. It’s a wonder there isn’t a red pencil permanently embedded in my wall. Oatmeal cookies good. Homemade chocolate chip better. Canoli best.
Posted by: Marie
Yeah, working for a living does indeed suck eggs. I only lasted one day.
Posted by: Iris
Hi guys! Now you can raid her stash while she’s gone. Pick something expensive — any of the really colourful sock yarn will do — and hold it hostage until she gives you cookies! Or you could just hide it to make her lose her mind further (while not particularly nice, it is rather amusing to watch).
Posted by: Nadia
Well my little worker bee, the red pencil gig beats working at McDonald’s. I hope it does, anyways.
Posted by: claudia
Jaysus, I hate it when Claudia is right.
I think, in the process of creating a hellish Shakespeare exam for NYC summer school students, I ate my red pencil. So, since I can no longer erase my red marks, this means all of my changes are always right. Right?
A cookie would have gone down a bit better, I think.
Since Cari’s red pencil is embedded in the wall somewhere, she’s no longer armed, so I think I’ll give her a hug in addition to those cookies….
Posted by: Lee Ann
Bawahahahahaahahahaha
Try using blue ink next time. It’s less offensive and will remind you less of getting bad marks in school.
At least if you have to run screaming from the room, since the blue ink will have calmed you more, you would have a chance to put some shoes on first.
Posted by: Jon
Now I can’t stop thinking about what would be the singular of Medici. Medico?
Posted by: mindy
Its true, working for a living does indeed suck! That’s why I don’t do it anymore! Ha!
The opposite kind of also sucks in its own way. Everything in moderation, I suppose.
Except cookies. 😛
Posted by: pippy
Dear Cari Doll,
Please tell Cari that I can relate. In fact, i can relate so much that I just inhaled a bag of Famous Amos chocolate chip cookies (no, they’re not as good as homemade, not by any stretch, but they’re what was in the snack machine at work). Yes, i did just consume the recommended daily allowance of saturated fat for the week. Yes, I am reading knitting blogs instead of working. But you know what? We adults, grateful though we may be to have gainful employment, need a break now and again. Weather permitting, I’ll bake Cari some cookies tomorow evening and bring them on Friday.
Posted by: regina
Can I come over so we can be bummed together?
Posted by: Stephanie
See, and if she weren’t a writer herself I’d suggest she take it out on the work. (Do I do that? No way! I swear! OK, maybe I curse a little when I see the same mistake 10 times and call them morons, but I try to restrain myself from drawing little gallows in the margins.)
Posted by: Anne
Your mom is talented, that doll is great! Although her hair is scraing me a bit.
Don’t step on anything pointy while running around barefoot, and could you send me some oatmeal cookies when your done? Please?
Posted by: Rebekah
Cari Doll, tell Cari that she is not alone in her frustration with work and that I hope she feels better v. soon. Also tell her that I keep thinking about the first line of her novel and wanting to read more…. 🙂
Posted by: Carrie
🙂
Posted by: alison
Its true, working for a living does indeed suck! That’s why I don’t do it anymore! Ha!
The opposite kind of also sucks in its own way. Everything in moderation, I suppose.
Except cookies. 😛
Posted by: pippy
Dear Cari Doll,
Please tell Cari that I can relate. In fact, i can relate so much that I just inhaled a bag of Famous Amos chocolate chip cookies (no, they’re not as good as homemade, not by any stretch, but they’re what was in the snack machine at work). Yes, i did just consume the recommended daily allowance of saturated fat for the week. Yes, I am reading knitting blogs instead of working. But you know what? We adults, grateful though we may be to have gainful employment, need a break now and again. Weather permitting, I’ll bake Cari some cookies tomorow evening and bring them on Friday.
Posted by: regina
Can I come over so we can be bummed together?
Posted by: Stephanie
See, and if she weren’t a writer herself I’d suggest she take it out on the work. (Do I do that? No way! I swear! OK, maybe I curse a little when I see the same mistake 10 times and call them morons, but I try to restrain myself from drawing little gallows in the margins.)
Posted by: Anne
Your mom is talented, that doll is great! Although her hair is scraing me a bit.
Don’t step on anything pointy while running around barefoot, and could you send me some oatmeal cookies when your done? Please?
Posted by: Rebekah
Cari Doll, tell Cari that she is not alone in her frustration with work and that I hope she feels better v. soon. Also tell her that I keep thinking about the first line of her novel and wanting to read more…. 🙂
Posted by: Carrie
🙂
Posted by: alison
it’s wonderful that you both know what it takes to bring her back; my bear has an awful tendency to tell people that I love tea and chocolate chip cookies, but most of the time no one pays attention. If I were closer I’d throw on my shoes and hit the bakery for some cookies, the store for some milk and the coffee shop for a latte, or a cup of good coffee, then I’d wander till I caught sight of her.
I hope things with the red pencil improve, and everything looks brighter tomorrow.
Posted by: Kristen
Cari doll…you must find her! Don’t let her just run away! What’s the matter with you! If I don’t hear from her soon, I’ll have to sneak around alleys with a flashlight whispering…”here Cari Cari Cari…..”
Posted by: john
When I read the third paragraph, I got a Depeche Mode song in my head, with spanky new lyrics. “Your own… per-sonal…. Me-dici…”
Posted by: Mandy
I am speechless and that is rare!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Betsy
you know, dollies dear, if you sell off her stash while she’s gone, you’ll have the money to buy your own cookies!! 🙂
Posted by: carolyn
cookies. yes. personally, i tend to go for a whole pint of cookie dough ice cream, but outmeal cookies work ok too.
Posted by: Rebecca
it’s wonderful that you both know what it takes to bring her back; my bear has an awful tendency to tell people that I love tea and chocolate chip cookies, but most of the time no one pays attention. If I were closer I’d throw on my shoes and hit the bakery for some cookies, the store for some milk and the coffee shop for a latte, or a cup of good coffee, then I’d wander till I caught sight of her.
I hope things with the red pencil improve, and everything looks brighter tomorrow.
Posted by: Kristen
Cari doll…you must find her! Don’t let her just run away! What’s the matter with you! If I don’t hear from her soon, I’ll have to sneak around alleys with a flashlight whispering…”here Cari Cari Cari…..”
Posted by: john
When I read the third paragraph, I got a Depeche Mode song in my head, with spanky new lyrics. “Your own… per-sonal…. Me-dici…”
Posted by: Mandy
I am speechless and that is rare!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: Betsy
you know, dollies dear, if you sell off her stash while she’s gone, you’ll have the money to buy your own cookies!! 🙂
Posted by: carolyn
cookies. yes. personally, i tend to go for a whole pint of cookie dough ice cream, but outmeal cookies work ok too.
Posted by: Rebecca