One of the secrets I’ve been keeping

The blurriest ultrasound image ever. Trust me. It's a fetus. A fetus with a very good heartbeat.

The blurriest ultrasound image ever. Trust me. It's a fetus. A fetus with a very good heartbeat.

Yep. I’m 9.5 weeks pregnant. Due 4/7/10. I know, I know…seems kind of early to be announcing a pregnancy after three miscarriages, but it’s been so hard to keep this news from you, and things are looking very, very good. (pooh pooh pooh)

We’ve been seeing a reproductive endocrinologist, but he didn’t have to actually do anything because I was already not quite four weeks pregnant when we walked into his office the first time. What it does mean is that we’ve been seeing someone who is accustomed to seeing only high-risk pregnancies, someone who you’d expect to be rather guarded about positive predictions. We’ve had two ultrasounds already (the privilege of the chronic miscarriage patient: very early ultrasounds) and both revealed a good growth rate and a strong heartbeat. After today’s scan, the doctor said, “When an ultrasound looks this good, hardly any women miscarry. I really think you’re going to have this baby.”

So…Woohoo!!!!!!!!!!!!! Between the ultrasounds and the fact that I’ve been feeling like absolute crap for weeks (just walking into the kitchen makes me nauseous and I can’t open the fridge. Serious 24-hour morning sickness), it looks like we’re going to get a baby this time.

What’s different this time, besides the fact that I’m still pregnant at this point? Well, I had every possible blood test and everything came back normal, so there was no specific treatment I could get. However, at my request my OB gave me a course of broad spectrum antibiotics before we tried for this baby, in case I had some kind of infection that wasn’t producing symptoms and that was what was triggering the miscarriages. I don’t know if that made the difference or not, but, well…I’ll take the result either way.

(And for those who insisted I had to wean the kiddo completely before I could get to this point? And for those nursing toddler mamas who were discouraged to read that in my comments? No. I have not weaned the kiddo. We night-weaned after I got pregnant, because I needed to get more sleep, but while we were trying, and for the first month of the pregnancy he was still nursing a ton at night. Now he still nurses at bedtime and sometimes at naptime. Just a word of encouragement for fellow long-term breastfeeding mamas, since we don’t get a whole lot of it out in the world.)

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141 comments on “One of the secrets I’ve been keeping
  1. janna says:

    Yay! I was hoping this was one of your secrets!

  2. catherine says:

    Congratulations!! ~~~Sticky baby vibes~~~

  3. Faith says:

    You gave me goosebumps and teary eyes. Only the best, most positive thoughts for you. Yay!

  4. Carole says:

    So happy. And yeah, I had a feeling about this.

  5. Bonney says:

    Thrilled for you guys!!! Fingers crossed, good vibes and anything else you need!! Yaaaaaaaaay!!!!

  6. Erika says:

    Congratulations! I’m sending good vibes your way.

  7. Mish says:

    Oh, what wonderful news! Congrats!!

  8. I am so incredibly happy for you…congrats!! Thinking the happiest of thought for you and the new little one.

  9. Ilona says:

    Yay! I’ve been sending you my fertility vibes as often as I remembered. Yay yay (I have 3 boys)

    Hugs to you

  10. pdxregina says:

    Congratulations! That’s one beautiful fuzzy fetus. My 6 year old learned a lot about how to prepare food for himself and his younger brother when I was pregnant with their sister, since I avoided the kitchen as much as possible for the first four months. Sleep well, eat when you can, take care.

  11. Kathleen says:

    Yay! Thank you for sharing your happy news.

    Best wishes,

    Kathleen

  12. Molly Gaudry says:

    All the best!

    Warm thoughts,
    M.

  13. Natalie says:

    Oh Yay!!!! I was so hoping that was one of the things you’ve been keeping from us. I’m so happy for you and your family. I will think happy healthy fetus thoughts in your general direction and wish you all the best!

  14. Brad Green says:

    Congrats! He’ll likely wean himself when your milk begins to flavor differently. That’s the way it happened with my wife. Again – congrats!

  15. megan says:

    yea! this is great news! you give another nursing momma hope! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  16. megan says:

    yea! this is great news! you give another nursing momma hope! ๐Ÿ™‚

  17. Emily says:

    I’m so glad this is one of your secrets! Mazel Tov!!!

  18. Gina says:

    Horray! Such good news. Good energy to you, from a toddler-nursing mama!

  19. mamie says:

    that is a beautiful sight, mama. thinking of you and your babies.

    such a good woman, to give a big old shout out to you amazing bf’ers. i am not one, but you make me wish i had been that good at it.

  20. Gina W says:

    Aww, congratulations! I’ve been hoping you would be able to have happy news like this ๐Ÿ™‚

  21. Lorajean says:

    Sign me up to deliver a meal for the middle of april! Yay!

  22. Congratulations!!!
    When you said you were keeping secrets, I was sure this was one of them. ๐Ÿ™‚

    So happy for you, really and truly.

  23. Juliette says:

    Doin’ the happy [baby] dance….

  24. Karma says:

    Fantastic! I’m so happy for you and really am hoping hard that you will continue on a healthy and easy pregnancy… thank you so much for sharing this!

  25. Kristy says:

    Woohoo! Yay, Cari! I am also 9.5 weeks pregnant, due April 8th & feeling like a pile of poop. May we both have delicious new babes in our arms by mid-April.

  26. Katie says:

    THIS!!!!!! is the best news I’ve had in weeks. Congratulations on your teeny sea horse. (It totally looks like a sea horse in the sonogram.)

    This is so much better than boob hives.

  27. Victoria says:

    Congratulations and lots of luck for a healthy, happy pregnancy and baby!
    (I am a new breastfeeding mother and it’s good to hear some positive nursing news so thank you for sharing that too.)

  28. Sam says:

    Thumper and Fuzzy – your little ones just name themselves….! Very best wishes from the UK x

  29. Becky says:

    !!!yay!

  30. Anna says:

    I’m so happy for you and your family!

    I’m wishing you luck the Swedish way; by holding my thumbs. ๐Ÿ™‚

  31. Jen says:

    That’s great news – thanks for sharing it, shared joy is double joy ๐Ÿ™‚

  32. Norma says:

    Mazel tov! (glad it’s you and not me, hahahaha)

    Highly interesting about the idea of an infection, etc. I never would have thought of that — but why not!

  33. Tricia says:

    Long-time reader de-lurking to say how happy I am for you and your family! I was hoping that this was one of the things you couldn’t say anything about and I’m so pleased things are going well. Glad the b’feeding is still working too – mine are well past that stage but I still miss it!

  34. Li says:

    Congratulations! I so wanted that to be one of the secrets you were holding. Yea for you and for the rest of the family. Thanks for sharing.

  35. Wendy says:

    I too was hoping this was one of your secrets. Sending all the good vibes I can gather together! xoxo

  36. Chris says:

    That is such good news Cari, congratulations! I hope your nauseousness will diminish/disappear once you’re over twelve weeks, but if it doesn’t, just remember it’s for a good cause.

  37. Jill Smith says:

    Oh, congratulations! Such good news!

  38. Emma says:

    Many, many congratulations ! I’m thrilled for you.
    It is difficult, in our culture, to breast feed for longer than a couple of months. People are strangely disapproving. I got a lot of grief from my mother once we’d gone past two years !
    Just keep doing what feels right for yourself.
    Take good care of yourself. Exciting times. :0)

  39. irene says:

    yay! yay! yay! hugs and kisses to the three of you.

  40. Sarah R says:

    Oh, huge congratulations! I can uncross all the fingers I’ve had crossed for you.

    Isn’t it strange how happy one can be for someone one has never met?

  41. jodi says:

    Oh, Cari, I hoped this was part of your big secret somethings. What wonderful news!

  42. Anna says:

    Congratulations!! I’ve been hoping for this news.

  43. Christiane says:

    Ooooohhhh!!! When you said you had secrets, I kept hoping this was one of them!!

    I’m so very happy for you! I know you must be absolutely ecstatic!

  44. Lee says:

    Soooo happy for you!

  45. Heather says:

    CONGRATS! This is wonderful news and you just made my Friday. I am so happy and excited for you and this is really awesome! ๐Ÿ™‚

  46. Cathy says:

    Congratulations!!!!!

  47. Cara says:

    Oh Cari! I’m so so happy for you!

    And I’m glad you’ve been able to keep nursing. We’re down to only nursing at bedtime and I have only about ten days left of that. I’m jealous you get to have both.

    I wish you all the best with the ms. I hope it only lasts a few more weeks.

    YAY!!!!!!!!!!!! Babies are THE BEST!

  48. Brandi says:

    Congratulations! Wonderful news.

  49. fillyjonk says:

    Whoa! Congratulations. I was really hoping this was going to be one of the “secrets” you were keeping.

  50. Amy says:

    I had SO hoped this was one of your secrets. Such happy, fantastic news. Congratulations to all three of you!

  51. Whitney says:

    Congratulations! I’ll be sending goo vibes your way.

  52. Jenni says:

    Hooray! Congratulations! and Yipee! So glad you’re sick, right?!

  53. Jill says:

    Congratulations!

  54. Sandra says:

    So thrilled to hear this was one of the secrets, and really glad to hear all the positive doctor stuff. Good throughts are being sent your way – so we can keep hearing about all the good stuff. I couldn’t abide the smell of dish soap when I was pregnant. Hy husband thought it was just a ruse to get out of doing the dishes. Maybe…

  55. Dee says:

    What wonderful news! Sending good thoughts your way.

  56. Riin says:

    I wondered if this was one of your secrets. Congratulations!

  57. Tanya says:

    I was hoping this was what was happening behind the scenes! Lucky Thumper to nurse this long too.

  58. Ditto all the preceding.

    But I have to say the picture looks like either a scorpion or a frog. (This is why men have limited involvement in this process.)

  59. Midj says:

    So happy to see that picture! I also had a tougher time getting pregnant the second time but luckily my midwives did not try to get me to wean my daughter. My kids are 3.5 years apart and I tandem nursed for 3 months after my son was born. They are happy, healthy 19 and 16 year olds who still get along. Mazel Tov and best wishes for the “morning” to dissipate soon.

  60. Anna says:

    I’m due 4/10/10, and my son is about 6 mths younger than yours. I totally get the feeling like crap part, it’s miserable. I am thinking good thoughts for both of us.

  61. kelly says:

    I am crying with joy for you and your family!

  62. ToniC says:

    My Friday just got a bit brighter because of your news. Congratulations – I’m sure Thumper will be a great big brother.

  63. Mary K. in Rockport says:

    Fut, fut, foo (is that the same as pooh, pooh, pooh?) times seven.

  64. rubyredruca says:

    WOO-HOOOOOO!!!!! Congratulations!!!! Those good vibes I’ve been sending your way must’ve worked ; ) I’m so happy for you guys!

  65. Kayla says:

    So many congratulations and well done thoughts!!

  66. Julie says:

    Yeah!! I have been thinking of you and sending you maternal vibes! I’ll keep sending them, hoping you feel better. (Though I think the yukkiness means you are REALLY pregnant.)

  67. Lorraine says:

    I’ve been readying for a long time… just never commenting. I just had to comment now. Can I say how happy I am for you and your family? Best wishes on a healthy pregnancy. ๐Ÿ™‚

  68. gaile says:

    Oh I am just over the moon for you guys. I have been reading for what seems like forever, and am so happy that this is happening for you. Sending lots of good thoughts your way.

  69. Shana says:

    Congratulations!!!

  70. Jeanne Horvath says:

    I am very happy for you. I hope all continues to go well.

  71. Mandy says:

    Wow! Congrats!!!

  72. Heather L says:

    Congratulations!

  73. georgia says:

    congratulations! i’m due in early april too, and also nursing a toddler.

    wishing you a beautiful, uneventful pregnancy ๐Ÿ™‚

  74. cherylc says:

    I’m very happy for you. S/he is beautiful.

  75. Annie says:

    Good for you and the Mister and Thumper–it’s really a family effort, right? And does this mean you’ll get to bump up the $50 food allowance since you’re eating for two (as soon as you start eating again)? Congratulations and best wishes.

  76. Knittripps says:

    Congratulations! I am very happy for you.

  77. Heather says:

    Hurray! I’ll be praying for your little lima bean. Or pinto bean. Or martini olive (I had to google to see how big).

  78. Debra in Seattle says:

    I am delighted. What a wonderful secret to share. Thank you for sharing the sweet as well as the bitter. We are blessed to be your readers.

  79. Jaimi says:

    So thrilled for you guys! Take such good care of yourself…lots of rest and only things that bring you joy.

  80. beverly says:

    Congratulations! What fantastic news!

  81. Ginny says:

    That is fantastic news!!!

  82. Abbey says:

    Congrats! Yay for baby baking!

  83. cateinBC says:

    Am so so glad for you, Cari et al.

  84. Sharon says:

    So happy for you all! Wonderfull news. And good on you – regarding the long time nursing, I think you are doing a great thing.

  85. Helen says:

    That is a beautiful fetus. I am so thrilled! Congratulations!!

  86. Serena says:

    Yay, for blurry baby Chicken!! The cutest blur ever ๐Ÿ™‚ I’m so glad for you.

    Besosbesosbesos

  87. caroline says:

    O, Frabjous announcement!!! Sooo happy for you all. And if Thumper was/is Thumper, maybe this little fritter is Swimmer? S/he surely did have mama and papa swimming upstream to get there…
    all best wishes, girl!

  88. Celia says:

    Now THAT is good news.

  89. Jackie says:

    Congratulations! Lots of nausea and tiredness are great signs, as my doctor said to me -they mean lots of pregnancy hormones are circulating. Best wishes from a mom typing this while nursing her 12 month old!

  90. rams says:

    Excellentest. Presbytera says in Greek it’s “Tussu, tussu, tussu,” — so with the greatest affection I spit in your general direction.

  91. Rebecca says:

    Excellent news! I am having flashbacks to where I was one year ago (Rudy was due 0n 4/11) hang in there. My hormone hangover lifted magically by the beginning of October, here’s hoping yours lifts soon. Savor your pregnancy.

  92. Samira says:

    So happy for you! Wishing you the best.

  93. marrije says:

    That is the bestest secret. Congratulations, and have a good and healthy pregnancy. And also: YAY!!

  94. Donna in VA says:

    I’ve been a lurker for years but coming out from lurking to congratulate you and your family! It is such good news to see that someone who is such a dedicated mother is going to mother another lovely child.

  95. Samantha says:

    Congratulations, I know how much you have wanted this. You deserve to be happy with the hell you’ve been through. Enjoy it!

  96. Caroline says:

    I am near tears. This is the most wonderful news on the planet.

  97. Chris says:

    Thinking happy baby thoughts for you!

  98. Jenny says:

    Many congrats! Have been through this myself, so while it’s presumptuous say “I know what you’re going through”, I have been where you are. Happy for you and your family.

  99. Johanna says:

    Cari, I’m just catching up on blogs, but I couldn’t let this one go by without a comment… this is wonderful news! Congratulations!!! Everyone who wants a baby that badly should get one (or another one in your case). It’s so sad when nature doesn’t work, I’m glad it’s working again for you.

  100. xina says:

    Congratulations!! Another adorable pumpkin!
    Biggest hug ever for you and the boys and the wee one

    pooh! pooh! pooh!

  101. greta says:

    Blessings to you, dear!

  102. Rebecca says:

    Oh congrats! congrats! congrats!

    CONGRATS!

  103. Lizbon says:

    Oh wahoo!!!!!!!

  104. Kim says:

    OMGosh!!! I was just looking thru my blogroll and thought “I’m going to check Cari’s blog and see if she’s blessed with a pregnancy yet” and lo and behold! Wooooohooooo!!!! So very happy for you!!

  105. Renee says:

    Huge congratulations!!!

  106. Jennifer says:

    !!!
    Blessings to you and your family!

  107. Sara says:

    Congrats ! I was praying hoping for this…

  108. Crossing my fingers for you, congratulations! Take good care!

  109. Jody says:

    I’ve never posted – but I do check your blog every couple of weeks, especially looking for this news, and I couldn’t not say anything – CONGRATULATIONS all the way from the UK!!!

    Hope you don’t feel sick for too much longer.

  110. valentina says:

    oh my goodness!!! congratulations and will be hoping for the best possible and lots of good luck and fabby vibes. yes, fabby vibes. can’t be bad. xoxoxo

  111. gleek says:

    yay! congratulations!!! i guess i should read blogs more often ๐Ÿ™‚ i’m glad to hear that everything’s working out so far and that your doctor is extremely positive!! that’s great news!

    and my god, i had 24-hour morning sickness for months. i hope it lets up for you!

  112. Steph VW says:

    What wonderful news!! I’m doing joyful Kermit-arms for you!

    Stay snug, little bean, you’ve got lots more growing to do. xoxo

  113. Kristen says:

    I am absolutely over the moon for you and your family! I hope things continue uneventfully and the nausea passes.

    (are you going to find a midwife, or stick with the ob?)

    (I’m in the process of converting and was very glad to read about the pooh, pooh, pooh. Consider this pregnancy pooh’d from the northeast…)

  114. Alyssa says:

    Congratulations – Best wishes for a continued healthy pregnancy!

  115. Angela says:

    What wonderful news! So many women I know who have had children say that morning sickness is a good sign. I will send good thoughts and prayers your way.

  116. Patricia says:

    My fingers and toes are crossed for you!

  117. Jen B says:

    I was hoping this was one of the secrets! Congratulations!!

  118. anina says:

    Yay, yay, yay! Love you.

  119. Congrats! I’m so happy for you and your family!!

  120. pattie says:

    tears of joy for you and your family!!!!

  121. Paula says:

    I’m so excited for you!!

  122. Bonnita says:

    Congratulations from a fellow Utopian. The leaves are turning!

  123. Rita says:

    I nursed my daughter for 2.5 years and I now have a happy healthy 17 year old who still hugs me and says she loves me without me begging.

    GO NURSING!

  124. LeAnne says:

    Hadn’t visited your blog in awhile and came to it today to see this great news. So happy for you and just as an aside. Nurse that guy as long as it’s a good experience for both of you. I nursed my three kids for a year each, because that is all they wanted, but to each his own. I wish detractors would just keep their mouths shut. Good going and congratulations again!

  125. claudia says:

    Pretty damn good secret. Congratulations!

  126. Reyna says:

    Mazel tov! Rrrerrr! Much love to you and yours, lady! xoxo

  127. TJ says:

    What great news! Best wishes! I also wanted to let you know I nursed through my second pregnancy, and actually ended up tandem nursing for awhile. I’m sure you’ll do whatever feels right for you and your family.

  128. stephanie says:

    I’m late, but thrilled.

  129. Martha says:

    YEAH!!!! So many good wishes sent your way.

  130. Anna says:

    Congratulations! And good for you for still nursing! Here’s to a totally boring pregnancy (the best kind).

  131. Ruth says:

    This is the happiest news. Congratulations … I am so very, very excited for you.

  132. LauraC says:

    Oh what wonderful news! Congrats to the whole family ๐Ÿ™‚

  133. Heather says:

    Oh CONGRATS! I hadn’t visited the blog in a while and almost didn’t, but I had a feeling and so I checked and was thrilled to see this news. I was hoping to read that you were once again expecting. Positive thoughts for a happy healthy pregnancy and the wonderful new life to nurture.

  134. Laura says:

    Yay! I searched backward (didn’t have to go very far) and found what I was looking for! Another “Congratulations!” never hurt anybody!! And a prayer for that sweet heart beat to keep on. ๐Ÿ™‚

  135. Well damn I am SO late to this party – for some reason I haven’t been able to access your blog! But today I did it through the link on Facebook. Anyway – congratulations way after everyone else’s! SO thrilled for you. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Giant hugs and love

    XO

  136. Tiny Tyrant says:

    Congratulations Cari. Good luck with the rest of the pregnancy.

  137. joanna says:

    what a blessing! i’m very glad for your family.
    yes, the longtime nursing is very hidden. my kid pretty much weaned himself, with the teeniest hint of effort or pushing on my part, and the nursing stopped in july (age 3.4 years). i thought he would go on forever, but suddenly for the last few months he just wasn’t interested. (however, 2 months post nursing, he’s still got this “thing” for my breasts/nipples.) on the other hand, our neighbor friend (3.5 years) is still a very strong nurser. every kid is different, aren’t they?

  138. Rebecca says:

    Hooooorraaaaaaaay!!!! All my best wishes are going out to you! Congratulations!

  139. Lina in Sweden says:

    Iยดm so happy for you! Congratulations! You made me cry!

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